The best one was pulled off by Mykael and Tyler. They purchased this huge furry looking spider and placed it, ever so lovingly, on Buddy's side of the bed. When he pulled the covers back and saw that thing he screamed like a school girl and ran down the hall yelling. The kids and I never let him live that one down.
My personal favorite though, was coming home one day from work to find him in the hallway with a loaded shot gun. No I'm not exaggerating. I wish I was. There was a spider, he called a tarantula, sitting on the base board. He was taking aim right as I opened the door and yelled "BUDDY! What in the...." He looked at me like a scolded child caught with his hands in the cookie jar and exclaimed "it jumps!!" I fussed and yelled.... "Are you kidding me? It's a SPIDER! Be normal and get a shoe! If I hadn't come home...what?...you know how many holes you'd have to fix? What if you hit a wire? Sometimes I wonder if you think at all!"...while throwing my bags down and coming into the hall way to unarm this lunatic. I grabbed the gun from his hands, still ranting and raving, shaking my head and looked at him. Obviously he saw nothing wrong with this and innocently said "well, KILL IT!!" I smacked it with my hand to knock it off the wall and he ran. I walked by him with the innocent, now dead, spider wondering how this man could be so tough and protective of his family and yet shake in his boots over a little spider. To hear his side of the story he'd tell you it was the biggest spider he's ever seen! In truth, it was the size of a dime. No joke!
The pranks we've pulled could be on a show I'm sure. There have been some great ones! Baby powder in my blow dryer (I could have killed him myself over that), bottle rockets in a pot when he was sleeping, smoke bombs, ice water baths, you name it. The best one I did was loud popping explosives under the toilet seat. I set it up in the middle of the night and placed 3 just under the lid. Normally you would throw them and upon impact they sound like a gun going off. These aren't the kid poppers, these come with a warning! As soon as he woke up in the morning and got his coffee, I waited. He went in, and about 30 seconds later I heard the loudest boom and then lots of commotion and not so nice words streaming from the bathroom. I sat in the bed, covering my mouth with the comforter and pillows laughing so hard I was crying. I wondered for a second if I had gone too far, too early in the morning, this time. There was silence...uh oh. I imagined him red faced and mad as heck! He opened the door and just stood there looking at me, still trying to muffle my laughs, and he bust out laughing! "I'll get you back for that one!!" And we laughed so hard!! He sat on the bed and I kept laughing and said "it's ok. That was it. You can go back in there now. It's safe. I promise!!!" His reply sent me over the edge, "nah, I'm good. I was sitting in the right place that's for sure! Scared the crap outta me...you got me!"
He kept his word too. He got me back. About 2 months later, when I'd finally let my guard down. When you know a person as well as you know yourself, it makes it so easy to prank them. While I was taking a shower, he loaded my blow dryer with baby powder. I didn't notice anything different at all. When I went to fix my hair I turned it on, pointed at the top of my head, and it snowed! More like a blizzard! My entire body from the shoulders up, and the entire bathroom, were covered in white. I got the last laugh on that one though cause as I got back in the shower, he got to clean the bathroom...or else!
My final prank wasn't one I planned. But it was just meant to be. It worked out too perfectly, and brought me healing as well. Who knew our childish games would get me through some of my hardest days? Monday we met with the funeral director to make his final arrangements. I had to get his clothing to them that same day, so after we left, my sister and I had to get his clothes together to take back up to the funeral home. With me wanting to prepare him myself, it put them on a bit of a time restraint to get everything done in time. I knew what he would wear. The irony of everything was insane. Just a month before, Buddy and I actually say outside one morning, talking about these very events. Drinking our morning coffee, Caylee still asleep and the boys off to school, he looked at me so seriously and said "Now I'm not saying soon. Good Lord knows I wanna be here to raise my babies and take care of you. But if something happened to me....." It was out of no where. But after we lost Buddy's Daddy in Oct 2012, unexpectedly, death was a common topic of discussion at times. It showed him how short life can be, and he had concerns. I got mad at him because who wants to talk about someone they love so deeply not being here? Not me! He kept talking anyways, and I'm glad now he did. From that conversation I knew everything he wanted. I even know what he wants from me...but that's something I'll have to work out on my own. Leave it to Buddy to want to have a say in my life even when he's not here! (That's a whole different entry though)
My sister and I ran by my house and grabbed his black dress pants and black pin striped Ralph Lauren dress shirt, just as he'd requested. He didn't pick out his own outfit specifically, but he did say what he wanted and this fit perfectly. I also had to take socks and underwear. Taking something like that, that he'd worn in life, just felt wrong. It felt too personal, almost violating. I decided I'd just buy new ones.
Shopping for clothing for my husband is something I've done so many times. No hesitation and no more thought than would he like this. Shopping that day was torture to a whole new level. I remember walking around the store (now I don't remember if it was Kohl's or Target...odd) and seeing all the "normal" people going about their day, smiling, laughing, casually browsing the racks. I kept wanting to yell "how can you do this? Don't you know I'm dying?!?" I knew the world would keep turning, even though mine was falling apart, but that shopping trip changed how I view the world. I look at people with less judgement than before. We really don't know the path someone is walking. I'm sure no one noticed my tears. No one knew the internal struggles my mind was warring with. I was struggling with what to do. Do I buy a pack? Then what do I do with the remaining pairs. I only need ONE! I need ONE pair of socks and ONE pair of underwear because he won't need the others. I didn't want left over pairs of "death socks". I actually thought to myself, "why can't there just be one stupid pair of socks and one pair of underwear so I can just get this done?!?" Almost immediately I found a pair of bright turquoise underwear. I laughed because it was my favorite color and so NOT Buddy! Then I spotted a pair that had garden gnomes all over them. I actually had to think about those...it was tempting! I decided that was a bit much, but the turquoise ones I couldn't pass up. I thought for a second if I'd brought these to Buddy to wear he would have joked about being fancy or me trying to make him wear "girly drawers"...yes there's been a conversation about this. My sister and I had a lot of laughs over thinking about the gnome undies though...can you imagine the look on the directors face?? Priceless! Wasn't long after we stopped cracking jokes about Buddy haunting us both if I bought gnome underwear, that I spotted the best pair of socks I've ever seen!! Hanging by themselves, just meant for my last prank....a gray and bright red pair of socks that had tacos on them! Tacos were one of his most favorite foods. And I'd actually cooked him his favorite meal twice in the last week he was with us. As I was laughing about taco socks my phone rang. Our friend, and preacher at our former church, Mike, was calling to schedule a meeting with me and Paul to discuss their part in Buddy's service. I told him I was shopping for Buddy and we talked about how I was doing with that. I told him my thoughts...he laughed and said "oh Christina...you have to!!" My thinking was: 1. Hello...I can finally have the last word with this man! 2. It's tacos! It's crazy! It's out of the box. It's so Buddy! 3. And most importantly, it made me smile and laugh. It made me remember to find the humor and remember the good. My thinking was that maybe, just maybe, when the pain of seeing my Love laying in his casket, I would remember...he is wearing the tackiest taco socks ever, and it would make me laugh!
I snatched those socks up, checked out and got out of that store as fast as I could. The socks did their job too. Not as much during the viewing and service, though I did think of them a few times and smile through the tears. My sister even came up to me once during the viewing, sneaking up to me somewhere between the one hundredth and second hundred hug and "how are you" and whispered in my ear, "taco socks". That was the best thing anyone said to me that entire night. Not that I didn't appreciate all the sentiments, well wishes, condolences and advice, but her words said "smile. I love you. I support you. I honor your way of grieving. Honor your way of living too." I've thought about those socks almost every day since though. They represent more to me now than I ever imagined. What was a way to get through 2 days has become a way to smile and remember those 2 days with a little Buddy styled humor, and not just the pain and sadness I felt. I know I honored him, how he lived and what we shared by choosing to find a way to laugh.
And.....well, I win babe!!! You can think how you'll get me back when I see you again! But for now, I pulled the last prank...gotcha! xoxoxoxo
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